Ikhwalithi enjalo, njengokuzethemba, ayinikezwa abesifazane besuka ekuzalweni, kufanele ifundiswe futhi "ikhule" ngokwayo ngokumelene nobunzima bokuphila. Ukuze ube nesibindi, kudingeka ufunde ukuthi uzithanda kanjani, uzinelise futhi uzuze okuningi ngokwakho, ukwazi ukusebenzisa ingqondo nemvelo.
Abesifazane babhekwa njengabameleli besifazane obuthakathaka, kepha lokhu akusho ukuthi konke akuphephile futhi kungenakuzivikela. Indalo yesintu engokwemvelo - ukuvikela ubulili obubuthakathaka - ivame ukuncintisana nesifiso sokufeza isimo esinamandla, esiyinkimbinkimbi, ngakho-ke amadoda akhangwa ngokungenakugwenywa ngabesifazane abazethembayo. Izimo ezithembayo zivame ukuba nomona phakathi kwezintombi ezingenamandla. Abantu abaningi bafuna ukuhamba ngobuso obuqhenyayo ebusweni babo cishe kunoma yisiphi isimo, kodwa abazi ukuthi bangazethemba kanjani, kodwa lokhu kuyadingeka - isifiso esinamandla, amandla okuziphatha okwanele kanye nesimo esithile sokuba namandla omoya, okunqunywa abantu base- choleric negazi.
Njengoba unesifiso sokuba ngowesifazane othembekile, qala ukuzama ukushintsha ushintsho olukhethiwe. Khumbula ukuthi "umsebenzi onzima kakhulu usebenza kuwe." Akudingeki ufunde kuphela ukubona okuhle kuzo zonke izibonakaliso ezizungezile, kodwa futhi ngokubekezela ubona ukushaywa kwekusasa.
Noma yisiphi isigameko sinezinhlawulo okungenani ukudonsa okuhle noma okuzuzisa wena - funda ukugqamisa lesi sici futhi usebenzise ngokunenzuzo, uma 'unamathele' ezinhlangothini ezingalungile - uzolahlekelwa yizinsalela zokuzethemba futhi ubungozi bube yindlala. Noma yikuphi ubunzima nokujika okubukhali ekugcineni kufanele ubone ngokubukeka ngokuziqhenya, ngemuva kokuba wonke umuntu oqinisekayo azi, ukuthi "zonke izinguquko zibe ngcono".
Indlela yokuzethemba futhi uphumelele?
Ukuphumelela ebhizinisini kuncike ngokuyinhloko ekuzithembeni ezenzweni, ngoba ungathandabuzi futhi uqaphele kancane, izenzo zakho ezinembile ziyiqiniso ngokunembile. Ukuzindla okude kakhulu nokuthi "isisindo-ngaphakathi" kuvele kuphela "ngamaphesenti angu-" angalungile, futhi hhayi ngokuqinile, izenzo ezinqunyiwe. Ngemuva kwakho konke, ngenkathi "ulinganisa izikhathi eziyisikhombisa", umuntu unesikhathi - ubamba, zama, ubuye noma ubuyekeze futhi usevele uvele "egqoke" kwakho.
Abantu abanokwethenjelwa banelisekile futhi abanaso umona, abakwazi nje ukucabanga ukuthi "Ngifuna izicathulo ezinjengeyakhe" noma "isikhwama sakhe sikhulu kunami", kuphela "Ngakhetha izicathulo ezisezingeni eliphezulu" kuzalwa ekhanda lami noma "Ngithole isikhwama esiphelele kakhulu izicathulo zami ezibomvu. " Yiqiniso, akulula ukushintsha imicabango yakho, kodwa funda ukwazisa lokho onakho, futhi uyisebenzise ngangokunokwenzeka, futhi ungaboni nxazonke 'ngomlomo ovulekile' namehlo enomona.
Uma senze isinqumo - ngifuna ukuzethemba, funda indlela yokwakha kahle imisho nemisho, ie. kuyadingeka ukuveza imicabango yakho ngendlela yokuthi abantu bangazizwa nje kuphela, kodwa futhi balalele amagama akho. Ngakho-ke, isibonelo, umuntu othembekile akalokothi aqale ingxabano ngegama elithi "Wena", usho isikhundla sakhe ngegama elithi "Mina". Zama ukuqala ingxabano yasekhaya nomyeni wakhe ngokuthi yiluphi uhlobo lomzila ozobuka ngalobubusuku, hhayi ngegama elithi "usuvele uthola imoto yakho ekudobeni"
Yeka isimo esifanayo emsebenzini. Ungalokothi ukhulume nabo ozakwabo ngethoni "kepha awulaleli", uthi "Ngiyakutshela ngakho" noma "ngombono wami, namuhla wenza kahle kakhulu", njll. Yiqiniso, ungakhohlwa ngokuvumelana, uma unquma ukuba yindoda "yensimbi," ungagxili phezu kwekhanda lomphathi. Kodwa uma umgomo wakho ukuhlala esihlalweni esiholayo, senze ngokuqinile, kodwa kancane kancane futhi, ngokuqinisekile, abaphathi bakho bayakwazisa imisebenzi yakho.
Uma unesibonakaliso se-phlegmatic noma i-melancholic futhi ucabanga ukuthi ungazola kanjani futhi uqiniseke, khona-ke yenza konke okukhulelwe ngendlela evamile, ungafuni "ukuqhubeka" nomunye umuntu, kodwa funda ukwazisa nokuthanda konke okwenzayo.