Yeka ukuthi kuhle kangakanani isikhathi sothando, ngobusuku balo bokulala, izimbali zezimbali, izifungo zokuthembeka kanye nomuzwa wenjabulo engenamkhawulo! Kodwa kukhona usuku, inyanga futhi ngokuzumayo uqala ukubona ukuthi othandekayo wakho ushintshwe ngokuzumayo. Noma yisiphi isenzo saqala ukucasula, futhi izindlu zomndeni ezilula zaqala ukukhula zibe izihlambalaza. Ungamangali - uqale nje isikhathi sokungaqondi kahle, futhi, ngokulula nje, inkinga yobuhlobo.
Ukungaqondi emndenini
Iningi lemibhangqwana emisha nje ukungena endleleni elula yokuphila eshadile iqiniseke ngokuphelele ukuthi ngeke ishintshwe yizo zonke izinkinga nokuphikisana kokuphila ukuthi isizukulwane esidala sisabisa kaningi. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuyini! Ukungaqondi phakathi kwalabo abashadile kwenzeka ngonyaka wokuqala emva komshado. Akusikho ngaphandle kokuthi izi-psychologists ziyibiza ngokuthi yinhlekelele yonyaka wokuqala. Ake sibone lokho esikwenzayo okungalungile ngobuhlobo bethu nokuthi kungani amadoda angama-90% abasha abasha abanobunzima bokungaqondi emndenini.
Okokuqala, kuphi, lapho izindima ezinjalo zomphakathi ziqala ukuvela khona, njengoba indoda nomfazi bazalwa masinyane futhi bengaboni kahle. Kungani lokhu kwenzeka? Izimpendulo zemibuzo ebonakala kunzima kakhulu zihlale zilele phezulu. Ake sibeke emashalofini, lapho ukungezwani okuhlangene kwenzeka khona. Ziphendule kumbuzo: lapho ushada noma uvuma ukuhlala ndawonye nengxenye yakho (njenge) yesibili, ucabanga ukuthi umndeni wakho uzoba njani? Ucabanga ukuthi kuzoba kanjani, akunjalo? Manje yimani futhi cabanga. Kodwa oshade naye naye ngandlela-thile ucabanga impilo ehlangene. Futhi kwakungewona abazali bakho abamkhuphula, kodwa abantu abangabazi. Yini esiyithola ngenxa yalokho: indoda nowesifazane bahluke ngokwabo, futhi baqala ukuhlala ndawonye, basebenzisa lawo maphethri abonakala enkambeni yokukhula ejikelezwe abazali babo. Ngamanye amazwi, lo mbhangqwana bangabantu ababili abane imibono emibili ehlukene ngokuphila komndeni. Futhi emva kwalokho, uyazibuza ukuthi ukukhwabanisa nokungaqondi emndenini kuvela kuphi? Amaphethini wokubheka impilo yomndeni, lokhu akuzona zonke izizathu zalolu donga lokuhlukanisa nomuntu othandekayo esakhayo ngezandla zethu. I-Panacea, ezokwephula zonke izithiyo zokungaboni kahle, namuhla ayikho. Kodwa-ke, kunezincomo ezijwayelekile ezivela ekuhlangenwe nakho okubuhlungu kwemibhangqwana eshadile enezinhlelo eziningi zeminyaka. Njengoba ubalalele, uzokwazi ukulondoloza umshado wakho nobuhlobo bakho.
Indlela yokunqoba ukungaboni kahle?
Ngakho, ubuhlobo bakho ekugcineni buyeke. Kubonakala kuwe ukuthi uvela kumaplanethi ahlukene, ukhuluma izilimi ezihlukene, futhi ngeke kube nokuphela kwalesi sigameko. Ngeshwa, abantu bavame ukuhlanganisa uthando nokungaqondi kahle. Ngenxa yobugovu bethu, sisola umthwalo wemfanelo ngobuhlobo bomuntu othandekayo. Nakuba eqinisweni, lowo onesithakazelo kakhulu kulo kufanele abalwe.
Futhi njengoba ufunda le ndaba, ake sisebenze ndawonye kanjani ukulwa ukungaboni kahle:
- Funda ukukhuluma. Lona ngumthetho olula wombhangqwana osemusha ngenxa yezizathu ezithile ezinganakiwe. Futhi ngokuvamile kaningi ngamantombazane. Awuyithandi lesi senzo: sigwinye, sithule, siphethwe ekhanda, sikhumbule. Futhi njalo izikhathi eziningana ngokulandelana. Futhi eshaweni sonke siye sabonisa ukwethembeka kwethu kudala. Futhi empeleni akasoze asole ukuthi asinelisekile ngento ethile. Futhi-ke sibe nesineke, simangalela umuntu ngazo zonke izono futhi simemeza ukuthi abasiqondi. Ngemuva kwalokho, ungaxoxa ngokushesha ngakho konke, kodwa ungagcini ukungazinaki kuwe, kwesokudla?
- Cabanga ngesimo: usuke ukhathele ngemuva komsebenzi, usuke uhamba kancane ekhaya, uhlangana nomuntu onganelisekile ngama-breaks akho angunaphakade, ngaphandle kokukunika ikhefu, uqala ukuphazamisa imibuzo mayelana nokuthi uyamthanda kanjani nokuthi uyamthanda kanjani, uyakhubeka ngokuthi uyamnika isikhathi esincane, futhi akawamukeli noma yimuphi izimpendulo ezifana nalabo abakhathele futhi kufanele ulale. Akubukeka sengathi yini? Kodwa amantombazane amaningi enza okufanayo nabathandekayo bawo. Khona-ke bayathukuthela ngokuthi "ngandlela-thile abaqondi."
- Awukho futhi ngaphansi kwezimo azikhulumi ngezihlobo zakho zesibili. Yebo, bonke banamaphutha. Kodwa wakhulela nabo, bangabantu abasondelene naye. Futhi uma kunjalo, uzozikhethela, hhayi wena. Ungenzi ngokwakho isizathu esingadingekile sokungavumelani.
- Yenza okungenakuqondiswa. Kulula kakhulu: ukupheka isidlo sakuthandayo, ukuhlangana ngokumomotheka ebusweni bakho, ukuvumela ukuthi uphinde ululame ngemuva komsebenzi wosuku olukhuni. Yiba nesineke ukulalela enye indaba mayelana nabathengi abazondayo, osebenza naye ozama ukufaka endaweni futhi mayelana nokuthi umshini umngane uthenge.
Amadoda awazi ukubonga. Mnike okuhle, futhi uzohlala ephindaphinda.
Izibonelo zokugwema ukungaqondi kahle ebuhlotsheni zingahle zibalwe ngokungapheli. Khumbula omunye umthetho oyinhloko - ikhaya alilona izelelo abesifazane. Yenza konke ukukwenza umuntu wakho azizwe edingekayo futhi ethandwa. Yikwazi ukukhuluma ngokufanele ngalokho ongathanda ukukushintsha empilweni yakho ndawonye. Vula izithiyo zokungaboni kahle, ungazivumeli zivele zivele. Inkatho yowesifazane akucabangi nje kuphela ngaye, kodwa futhi mayelana nezintshisekelo zalowo muntu. Qaphela uthando lwakho, wazi ukuthi umdela kanjani, futhi uzokuphendula ngokukhanya kokufudumala komuntu nokubonga kokhetho lwakho.