Amantombazane ngemvelo ayamahloni futhi izidalwa ezinamahloni. Ngezinye izikhathi kunzima ukuba bafinyelele kumfana kuqala, ukuqala ingxoxo, ukumanga kuqala nokunye okunye. Kodwa empilweni ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi lesi sinyathelo kufanele sithathe ezandleni zabo bese senza izinyathelo zokuqala ukuya ocansini olufanele, ngoba namadoda angase abe namahloni, noma angabe asolwa ngemicabango yentombazane. Kodwa inkinga ibona ukuthi kunzima ngabantu abanjalo ukuba balondoloze ingxoxo, futhi kungase kube nokuma okungahambi kahle. Intombazane, isibonelo, kungenzeka ukuthi angazi ukuthi ungabuza umfana, noma yimiphi imibuzo ongayicela yona, ukuze ungabheki, futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo ukusekela ingxoxo.
Imiphi imibuzo okufanele ngiyicele umfana?
Okokuqala, ake sichaze ukuthi yimiphi imibuzo edingekayo ukubuza umfana ngempela. Lesi sigaba sibandakanya izinkinga ezihlobene nezithakazelo, izintandokazi, izinhlelo zomfana. Sizohlinzeka uhlu oluthile lwezihloko ezifanele ingxoxo, futhi ungakwazi ukulilula kalula noma ukuzivumelanisa naleso simo ngasinye.
- Izihloko mayelana nezithakazelo zomfana. Uma ungazi ukuthi uyilutha, bese ubuza ngakho. Futhi uma usuvele uyazi lokhu, khona-ke ungacela ukusizwa. Isibonelo, isoka lakho lithanda ibhola, khona-ke ungambuza imibuzo mayelana: ithimba lakho elizithandayo, imithetho yomdlalo, abawinile be-Champions League, ukwahlulela amaphutha, ukuziphatha kwabalandeli nokuningi okuningi.
- Buza ngemithetho nemithetho yakhe yokuphila. Eminye imibuzo evela kule ndawo ingaba yinto ejwayelekile, futhi iyafaneleka ngisho nabantu abangajwayelekile. Lezi yizinto eziphathelene nobungane (amadoda nabesifazane, ubungani besifazane), mayelana nezilwane ezifuywayo, ngomsebenzi, mayelana nezinhlelo ziseduze hhayi nje kuphela ngekusasa, mayelana nokuthi uthanda ukuchitha kanjani ngempelasonto namaholide.
- Le mibuzo iyathandwa kakhulu kubafana, ngoba bayathanda ukuba phakathi, futhi ngenxa yemibono enjalo kulula ukuthola amaphuzu avamile othintekayo, nokwakha ingxoxo eqhubekayo.
- Noma kunjalo, ungahlanganyeli kakhulu ekubuzeni imibuzo, ngaphandle kwalokho ingxoxo izobukeka njengokudlula ukuhlolwa. Ukuze wenze lokhu, kwanele ukuphinda usebenzise imisho. Isibonelo, ungacela: "Ungena kanjani?", Futhi ungakwenza lokhu: "Sicela usitshele mayelana nezenzo zakho zokuzilibazisa."
Imibuzo eminye ongayicela umfana
Ungabuza umfana ngalokho akuthandayo ekuphileni kwansuku zonke. Isibonelo, ukuthi uthanda ukudla ukudla kwasekuseni, yiliphi umculo alilalelayo, yiliphi uhlobo lwe-cinema ayithandayo. Ungaba nesithakazelo ngokuphepha kumaqembu akhethandayo, abadlali, abadlali.
Isihloko esithandwayo kakhulu sokuxoxa yingane nokukhula. Kusobala ukuthi awudingi ukungena emininingwaneni, angeke ahlale ehambisana okokuqala ngemuva kokumazi kwakho, kepha mayelana nokuthi babe nomhlangano womndeni kanjani ngonyaka onguNyaka Omusha, lapho bahlala ehlobo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi waya emakamu okuphayona azohlala efanelekile ukuthatha isithakazelo.
Yimiphi imibuzo engcono kakhulu engayicela kumfana?
Ezinsukwini zokuqala, ukukhuluma ngamantombazane asekuqaleni (abafazi) kuyinhloko. Ezinyangeni ezimbalwa, noma ngisho neminyaka, ngokuqinisekile uzokwazi ukubuza le nsizwa kanye nemibuzo enjalo, kodwa ngesikhathi sokupheka kwesihlahla salesi sihloko kufanele sigwenywe. Kunezikhathi lapho umuntu ngokuzumayo eqala ukukhuluma ngobuhlobo bakhe obudlule. Kufanele uqaphele ngalokhu, ngoba ukuziphatha okunjalo kubonisa ukuthi akusekho iphuzu kulabo ubudlelwane noma lokho
Isihloko esilandelayo siyiholo (ngokunembile, ubungako bayo). Akubona bonke abantu abazimisele ukuxoxa ngobukhulu bemali yabo engenayo nentombazane, ikakhulukazi uma enenkinga ethile yezezimali.
Futhi isihloko sokugcina esicindezelayo yizinkinga zomfana. Uma engxoxweni kubonakala kuwe ukuthi umfana unakho, isibonelo, izinkinga nabaphathi bakhe, ngakho akufanele azame ukuthola ukuthi zingubani. Amadoda ayithandi ukukhombisa ubuthakathaka bawo, futhi uma ebanjwa kuwo, intombazane iyokwenza ngokushesha izwele kunesihawu.