I-Congruence - (i-Latin congruens, -isis-commensurate, efanele), ngokwengqondo: isimo sobuqotho; ukuthola ulwazi oluyiqiniso; izenzo ezihlanganyelwe, ezenzakalweni nezingezona izisho. Umuntu ohlangene uyindoda eqotho, engabonwa ngamanga. Isibonelo, uma sikhulumisana, singabona ukuxhumana kumbuso wangaphandle weqiniso langaphakathi. Lo mqondo we-congruence waqalwa nguCarl Rogers. Njengesibonelo sokungabonakali, kungase kube ukuzenzisa noma ukukhohliswa. Badidekile ngobuzenzisi nokuphindaphindiwe.
Umbono we-congruence
Umuntu obonisa ukungabi nalutho angase angaqapheli ngisho nalokhu. Kwenzeka ngesikhathi sokuthukuthela noma ukucindezeleka, noma ukudideka. Umuntu, ngalesosikhathi, ucabanga kanjalo. Futhi siyaqaphela lokhu, kodwa ungakhokhi, uqonde futhi uthethelele. Kodwa kwenzeka ukuthi umuntu ngamabomu uzama ukukhohlisa, ubeka imaski. Khona-ke siqala ukuphatha ngendlela ehlukile.
Bhala ngokuxhumana
Ngomuntu ohlangene ngifuna ukugcina ukuxhumana, ukuba nobuhlobo bebhizinisi. Sivame ukuqiniseka ukuthi amazwi akhe aqinisile. Asivakaswanga ngokungabaza ngokungaqiniseki kwakhe. Khumbula isimo sengqondo sakho kwengane encane.
Ekusebenzelaneni nabantu abasolisayo, qaphela njalo izinkomba zangaphandle. Ngokuvamile, abakwa-scammers bazinikela ngendlela engekho amazwi. Qhathanisa nalokho okuzwile, bese uzobe uqaphele futhi ugxile. Ngenxa yalokho, azikhohliswa. Isimiso sokubambisana kufanele sithembeke, kokubili wena nakwabanye. Abantu abazungezile bazizwa bengenangqondo. Lokhu kufanele kuqondwe. Kunoma yimuphi umsebenzi, abantu abathintekayo bayakwazisa kakhulu.
Ukubuthana ekukhulumisaneni
Nsuku zonke sidinga ukuthuthukisa ukuze sizithuthukise. Uma umuntu onamahloni oqhubekayo eqhubeka exabana endlini yakhe nasemgwaqweni, akasoze aphumelele. Ngoba kuzo zonke izenzo sizibonakalisa thina ngokwethu. Njengoba sinakho ekhaya nasemndenini, ngakho-ke sinokusebenza nabangani. Zama ukuthuthukisa umkhuba owusizo. Futhi-ke, ngayinye, sebenzisa abanye, esikhundleni sezinto ezimbi.
Ukuzifundisa kuyadingeka ekukhulumisaneni. Thembeka futhi uhle. Njengoba abantu abanjalo beyekethisa, kufanele bona, banesithakazelo.
Akunzima ukuba kube mnandi. Konke kuqala okuncane. Uma ufuna ukufezekisa lokhu kwabanye, qalisa ngokwakho:
- Okokuqala, njalo unikeza i-akhawunti yezenzo zakho nezenzo zakho, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi zingabonakala zingakanani. Ezimweni owaziwa kuwe kuphela, cabanga ukuthi ziyaziwa wonke umhlaba. Mhlawumbe, khona-ke uzocabangela kaningi, kodwa ngesilinganiso esikhulu, nakanjani, ungenzi iphutha.
- Okwesibili, uma sikwazi ukuzifundisa, kuzophinde kuvele kwabanye. Futhi bayokuhlonipha ngokwengeziwe futhi bakwethembe wena! Wonke umuntu uzokwazi ukuziphakamisa uma eqonda ukubaluleka futhi ebeka umgomo. Abangani bakho bangakusiza. Thembeka wena kanye nabanye. Inhlanhla!