Emphakathini wanamuhla, ungabhekana nenani elikhulu labesifazane abakholelwa ukuthi banomqhele wokuqedwa. Yileli gama ukuthi abameli bezocansi abalungile bachaze izinkinga ekuphileni kwabo. Ngaphambi kokubeka "ukuxilongwa" okunjalo kubalulekile ukuthola ukuthi kusho ukuthini lo mqondo.
Umqhele wokungathembeki usho ukuthini?
Ngokuvamile, le nkulumo ibizwa ngokuthi ukuhluleka kwabesifazane ukuzwa ukukhangwa ngokocansi, okuyinto eyisithiyo esiyinkimbinkimbi ekwakheni ubuhlobo. Umqhele ungadalwa kuphela ngumlingo onamandla futhi ubukeka sengathi "idome" elithile elingagqunywa umuntu. Kuyinto engenakwenzeka ngokomzimba ukuzwa ukuthi umqhele we-celibacy ukhona ngoba awuhambisani nokunyakaza kunoma iyiphi indlela futhi awubonakali uqobo. Ithonya elikhulu lenziwa ezingeni lezamandla, noma kunalokho ukuvinjelwa kwe-chakra yezocansi nenhliziyo kwenzeka. Kwamanye amacala, ezinye izikhungo zamandla zingavinjelwa, okuvusa inkinga kuphela. Omunye angasho into eyodwa: umqhele wokuqedwa ungavamile, futhi inkinga yesizungu yabesifazane abaningi ihluke ngokuphelele.
Ukuqonda isihloko, okusho ukuthi umqhele wokuqasha, kufanelekile ukucabangela umbuzo othi ubani ongayifaka. Ikhona ikhono lokulimaza, ngakho-ke, ubulili besifazane, kuphela izilingo ezinamandla ezimnyama, ezingekho eziningi kakhulu. Lapho isiqalekiso sihlelwa, akusiyo kuphela umuntu ohluphekayo, kodwa wonke umncintiswano wakhe. Ngokusho kwezibalo, okuyinto engqondweni yabantu abakhuluma ngayo, phakathi neminyaka yokusebenza kwabo phakathi kwamakhasimende amaningi, abantu abambalwa kuphela babenomqhele wokungathembeki. Lokhu kubalulekile ukucubungula, ngoba abaningi ababikezeli benhlanhla nabathakathi bavame ukubeka "ukuxilongwa" ngaleyo ndlela kuphela ukuze bathole imali futhi akukho lutho.
Indlela yokunquma ukubopha uhlobo lokuzalwa?
Hlola uma kukhona le nkinga, ingabe unomlingo wangempela nomqondo wengqondo. Nakuba kukhona indlela yokwenza wena ngokwakho. Ngokuvamile ukuba khona komqhele kuvela emgqeni womshado, osekugcineni komunwe ngaphansi komunwe omncane. Kubalulekile ukucabangela ukuthi lo mkhakha ubonisa ubudlelwane bokuthandana, hhayi inyunyana ebhalisiwe. Uma kungekho mgwaqo ezandleni zombili, khona-ke umuntu angakwazi ukuba nomqhele wokuqothula. Ubufakazi bokuthi bukhona buyi-Mercury - umugqa ozungeza isisekelo somunwe omncane. Ngokuvamile amasundu anjalo "uphawu" lubizwa ngokuthi indandatho yomfelokazi.
Ukususwa komqhele we-celibacy
Kukhona indlela yonke eyosiza ekuqedeni ukulimala okuhlukahlukene kwesizungu. Ukuze wenze umkhosi, udinga ukuthenga amakhandlela angu-4 esontweni. Omunye wabo wabeka phambi kwesithonjana "sesilisa," esingakwesokunxele komnyango. Esinye ngaphambi "kwesifazane", esisekunene. Beka ikhandlela lesithathu phambi kwesithonjana sikaSt. UNicholas the Sinner, futhi ukususa umqhele wokungathembeki esontweni, tshela la mazwi:
"Mnceli omkhulu kaNkulunkulu, ngiphe, inceku kaNkulunkulu (igama), usizo lwakho nokuvikelwa kwakho."
Ziwela futhi uhlebeze usho ngenkinga ekhona. Bese ubeka ikhandlela lesine kunoma iyiphi indawo impilo yezakhamuzi zakho bese uthi izikhathi ezine.
"Ngegama likaBaba, neNdodana, noMoya oNgcwele." Mina, (igama lakho),
Ngemuva kokuthenga ikhandlela. Inani labo kufanele lifanane nenani lamadoda abahlulekile ukwakha ubuhlobo . Uma bephila, bese ubabeka ekuphumuleni, futhi uma befile, khona-ke impilo. Uma usuka esontweni, sebenzisa izinhlamvu zemali eziningi njengoba ufuna ukuzibuza. Ukuze uqinise umphumela wenkambo, ungavuma noma uthathe isidlo. Ngemva komkhuba, kubalulekile ukwenza umcimbi wokuphila okungcono ngenyanga ezayo.
Ukuze uqale impilo ngobuso obuhlanzekile, kutuswa ukuthi uxhumane nomsizi wezengqondo ozosiza ukuqonda inkinga, kholelwa kuwe futhi unike amandla amandla obudlelwano obusha.