Ubani ozophikisana neqiniso lokuthi uthando luhle? Inkathazo ukuthi ngezinye izikhathi lo mzwa omuhle udidekile nokuxhomeka - izinto, ngokomzwelo noma ngokobulili. Lesi simo sibangela ukuhlupheka okukhulu futhi kuyinkinga okudingeka uyilahle.
Ukuthembela ngokocansi kumlingani wakho
Ngokuvamile kwenzeka ukuthi ubuhlobo buyeke ukuletha noma abuzange bulethe noma iyiphi injabulo, kodwa ayikho amandla okubavimba. Kulesi simo, kuncike ebuhlungu kumlingani, okuvame kunzima ukunqoba ngokuzimela. Ngokuvamile, ukuthembela , kufaka phakathi ucansi, kwenzeka kubantu besifazane, amadoda athembele kakhulu kumlingani wabo. Iphuzu lapha lingokomzwelo omncane, ikhono lamadoda elincane lokudinga kakhulu umuntu, okubangelwa ekuqaleni (iminyaka engaba ngu-3) ukuphuka ekuxhumeni ngokomzwelo nomama. Ukuba nesipiliyoni esinjalo, futhi futhi ekhuliswa ukwesaba ukukhula njengendodana "yindodana", amadoda anomshwalense wokulwa nobuhlobo obunjalo obubuhlungu.
Abesifazane abanalo ikhefu elinjalo, abaningi bahlala besondelene nomama wabo, sebevele bakha umndeni wabo. Ngakho-ke, ukuxhomeka kobulili kumuntu kuvela kalula, ngokuvamile kuvamekile lapho kusukela eminyakeni yokuqala kudala isithombe esicacile somuntu ofanelekayo sakhiwa, futhi uma kwenzeka lokho kwenzeka ngokuzumayo empilweni yangempela, umuntu usengasho kakade ukuqala kokubunjwa okunamathiselwe okubuhlungu. Kuyathakazelisa ukuthi umzuzu we "hit ngqo" ungagcinwa kuphela yi-subconscious, kuyilapho ekuboneni kwakhe lona wesifazane eqonda ngokucacile ukuthi le ndoda ayinaso ikusasa, kodwa ayikwazi ukuphula lobu buhlobo.
Kuyasabisa nokuthi uma "ukukhishwa" kwenzeka okuthile kokufisa, owesifazane ulahlekelwa ikhono lokubukeka ngeso lengqondo ngesimo, uzimisele ukuthethelela futhi athethelele zonke amaphutha kanye namaphutha abathandekayo, ngisho nokuhlubuka. Kancane kancane, ikhono lokuhlola okucabangelayo lilahlekile ngokuphelele futhi owesifazane owake waphawula ubuhlobo obukhona njengesimo "socansi" uqala ukuhlela ezinye zekusasa, ukucabanga ukuthi zonke izinhluleka zingezesikhashana, bese ulindele ngempela injabulo enkulu. Kodwa izinkinga azifuni ukuphela, ubudlelwane buletha ubuhlungu, ukukhungatheka nokukhathala okwedlula zonke, okungekho amandla okusebenza, noma okuwodwa. Kusobala ukuthi ubudlelwano obunjalo bubuhlungu, futhi ukuxhomeka kocansi kumlingani kudinga ukwelashwa. Kuyingozi ukuthi esimweni sesikhathi eside salo hlobo kunzima kakhulu ukuphuma kuwo, kuphela ochwepheshe angasiza, ngubani ozobona zonke izimbangela eziholela esimweni esidabukisayo, futhi uzophakamisa izindlela zokuqhubekela phambili ukuguqula.
Ukwelashwa kokuxhomeka kocansi
Ukunamathiswa okubuhlungu kuvame ukulukhuni ngezici ezengeziwe, okuso kunzima kakhulu ukubona nokuvuma ukuthi lokho kuyini. Ngokuvamile amantombazane ayesaba ukuhlukana nobudlelwane ngoba nje azibheka njengento engathandeki kwamanye amadoda. Kuyathakazelisa ukuthi abakhulumi ngokuzwakalayo ngokungabi nalutho, kodwa ngenxa yezizathu ezithile bayeke ukuthenga izingubo ezintsha, ukwakheka kwezingubo zokugqoka nezinwele ezinhle kubhekwa ngokungadingekile, futhi imihlangano nabangani ngokuvamile iyenzeka kanye ngonyaka. Khona-ke imisebenzi esebenzayo kuphela ezosiza, okungukuthi, ukubiza abangani bese uhamba kahle, uye emhlanganweni. Makungashintshi konke ngesikhathi esisodwa, kodwa isinyathelo sokuqala sizokwenziwa.
Zama ukucabanga ngeso lengqondo ukukhululwa kwakho kuzibopho ezinesizungu. Ungakwenza lokhu ngokwengqondo, ubonise okuthile okungabonakali okubangela izinkinga zakho, futhi ususe kancane kancane izingcezu zalo, ubhubhise. Ungakhohlwa ukutshela konke okubuhlungu. Ungakwazi ukudweba isithombe nesipulasitiki noma uyidwebe ephepheni,
Uma uqonda ukuthi awukwazi ukubhekana nawe ngokwakho, hamba kumtholampilo. Ngoba izizathu eziholela ekuziphatheni okunjalo, zingafihla ebuntwaneni obude. Futhi kaningi umuntu, njengoba evele ngaphansi kwezimo ezingenakulinganiswa, akakwazi nje ukuwubuka ekhoneni elihlukile, lochwepheshe uzosiza ukukwenza.
Enye yezindlela zokuqeda ukulutha kuyindlela yokwelashwa kweqembu. Ngakho-ke, unganqikazi ukuhlangana nabangane ngengozi, uxoxe nabo emaforamu, kuzosiza ekubukeni isimo ngokuhlukile.