Udlame lwasekhaya aluvamile kulezi zinsuku. Isongo esinjalo singaba ngokomzwelo, kwengqondo, ngokomzimba. Lokhu kuyisenzo esicindezelayo esicindezelayo ngomuntu oyedwa ukuze alawule, asabise, avuse umqondo wesaba kumuntu ohlukunyeziwe.
Kuyini ubudlova basekhaya?
Udlame lwasekhaya lubophezela ngamabomu, noma isenzo somuntu oyedwa kunomunye, umdlwenguli akaqapheli intando kanye nesithakazelo sezisulu. Ukucindezelwa okunjalo kuphela ngokulimala komzimba, ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzwelo, ukuphambuka kwentuthuko, umonakalo. Umehluko omkhulu phakathi kwengcindezi enjalo ukuthi uzibophezele phakathi kwabantu abaseduze abahlobene nabo.
Udlame lomndeni lungathatha izinhlobo ezahlukene. Abafana ngokuvamile bahlushwa ngokobulili, ngokomzimba. Amalungu asebekhulile, abasengozini emndenini bavezwe ngaphansi kwengcindezi. Kunezikhathi lapho abafazi benza izenzo zobudlova ngokumelene nabayeni babo. Kodwa ngokusho kwezibalo, abangaphezu kuka-70% kwalabo abahlukunyezwe ngabesifazane, amantombazane.
Uphi udlame lwasekhaya luqala kuphi?
Ubudlova emndenini buhluke ngokuphindaphindiwe okuhlelekile kwezenzo, imijikelezo:
- Ukwanda kwezingcindezi . Umdlwenguli ucasuliwe futhi ngaphandle. Ukwehlukana okunjalo kunqatshelwe yilabo abathintekayo kanye necala, ukuqondisa okwenzekayo ngokucindezeleka, ukungathandeki emisebenzini noma impilo embi. Kancane kancane, isisulu sizama ukunciphisa ukungezwani, sicela ucabangane naye. Ngisho noma ekwazi ukuxazulula ukucindezeleka okwesikhashana, emva kwesikhashana iphinda ikhule ngamandla amakhulu nakakhulu. Lesi sigaba sokucindezeleka singathatha izinyanga, noma ezinsukwini ezimbalwa zikhule zibe yisigaba sokuhlukumezeka okusebenzayo.
- Udlame lwasekhaya olusebenzayo . Umdlwenguli ufuna indlela yokuphuma kwengxabano eqoqwe. Izenzo zobudlova zenziwa ngaphandle kwamanye amazwe futhi zingathatha imizuzu eminingana noma amahora amaningana. Kungakhathaliseki uhlobo lokucindezelwa, njalo kuhambisana nokuhlambalaza, ukuhlazeka. Kuyinto evamile ngesimo lapho umdlwenguli ebeka isisulu ngenxa yezenzo zakhe. Akekho umdlwenguli, noma isisulu asisayikuphika iqiniso lobudlova, kodwa bahlukumeza ubukhulu bobudlova.
- Ukuphenduka . Lesi sikhathi sihambisana nokuphefumula okwesikhashana, ukuzisola, ukuzola okuhlobene. Umhlukumezi ukhulula icala lakhe nganoma iyiphi indlela kanye nezindlela, okugqugquzela isisulu ngenkolelo engcono esikhathini esizayo. Isisulu senza iphutha lokuthi udlame lwasekhaya emndenini luyophela. Nakuba lowo ohlukumezayo eqhubeka nokusola isisulu futhi efakazela ukuthi nguye owamcasula izenzo ezinjalo.
Isigaba sokugcina asihlali isikhathi eside, maduzane konke kuphinda kumbuthano ononya. Uma konke kushiywe njengoba kunjalo, uma isisulu saphela ukumelana nalokho okwenzekayo, isigaba sokuphenduka singase sishabalale. Udlame oluqhubekayo olubhekiswe kwabesifazane kancane kancane lubuhlungu impilo engokwenyama, engokwengqondo yesisulu, okubangela isidingo sokushiya. Kodwa kaningi endleleni kukhona izizathu eziningi ezivimbela ukushintsha isimo futhi ushiye umhlukumezi. Ukwesaba ukushiywa ngaphandle kwemali, yokulahlekelwa yindawo yokukhosela, yezingane. Kwenzeka ukuthi lezi zihlobo ngokwabo zenze ukuthi isisulu sihlale nomdlwenguli.
Udlame lwengqondo
Umdlwenguli wengqondo uyashintsha kakhulu isimo sakhe, ukubonisa umona onganele, ukuzithiba okuphansi. Uyakwazi ukucasula ngisho nokugxekwa okungabalulekile. Engxoxweni evame ukuvakashela ukuhlambalaza, ukukhala, izinsongo. Umdlwenguli wezengqondo uthembisa umlingani wakhe ngothando olungathandeki futhi ngokushesha uphonsa izinsolo ngesimo sakhe sengqondo esonakele.
Udlame lwengqondo ngokumelene nomuntu luhambisana nenqwaba yezibonakaliso:
- ukugxeka okuqhubekayo;
- ukuthukwa nokuhlazeka;
- ukuhlambalazwa okufihliwe ngesimo samagama okugaya, ukuhleka usulu, ukuhleka okubuhlungu;
- isifiso sokwenza umhlukumeze anecala;
- ukungazinaki;
- ukuthula;
- ukuxoshwa;
- ukuphoqelela ukwenza izenzo ezingathandeki.
Ubudlova bokuziphatha
Ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo kuyithonya emqondweni wezingqondo, umlingani womlingani ngokwesabiso, izinsongo zokuthukwa, ukugxeka, ukukholelwa. Udlame lwasekhaya lwasekhaya luvezwa ngokulawulwa, okubonakalayo:
- vimbela ukuxhumana;
- ukubhekwa;
- ukuhlala njalo;
- umkhawulo wokuxhumana nomhlaba wangaphandle;
- ukubeka indima yokudla;
- ukuzithiba ngokocansi.
Futhi, ubudlova obungokomzwelo bungabonakaliswa ngendlela yokuxhaphaza. Inhloso yengcindezi enjalo ukuzithoba ngaphansi kwemizwa yakho yezinkolelo, izenzo zesisulu. Kunzima kakhulu ukubona izimpawu zokucindezeleka okunjalo ngokomzwelo, ngoba izenzo zomdlwenguli ziyimfihlo, ziyazi kahle. Kodwa ezinye izici zobunikazi zingasiza ekuboneni nasekuhambeni kwesikhathi ukuvimbela ukuxhaphazwa:
- ukuziqhayisa, lapho umyeni ekhulisa izimfanelo zakhe, impumelelo ngaphezu kwalawo umkakhe;
- ukucasula imizwa yecala ngokubheka kancane kancane;
- ukuthokoza komfazi, ngakho waqala ukudumisa umyeni wakhe;
- ukuqamba amanga, ukugwema ulwazi oluthile lokwenza isipiliyoni esisisulu, wenze okuthile ngenxa yeqiniso.
Ukuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba
Ubudlova obungokomzimba emndenini bubonakala ngokushaya, ukulimala emzimbeni, ukuhlukunyezwa, okulimaza kakhulu impilo yomuntu ohlukumezekile. Ngesikhathi esifanayo u-tyranny onjalo angabonakaliswa njengokushaya okuncane nokubulala. Isisekelo sokucindezelwa ngokomzimba kuwukubusa, ukuhlukunyezwa, ngakho kugxile kobulili. Abesifazane abaningi bayabona ukuthi izenzo ezinjalo zomyeni zijwayelekile. Uma udlame lwasekhaya lubonakala phezu kwezingane, esikhathini esizayo baba isihluku kwabanye.
Kungani umyeni eshaya umkakhe - kwengqondo?
Kunezinhlobo ezimbili zamadoda angakwazi ukuphakamisa izandla phezu kwabesifazane:
- Labo abavusa ukuvutha intukuthelo ngokwabo, bebiza futhi behlazisa omkabo, bevusa ngokwabo intukuthelo enkulu;
- Labo abasezingeni elitholile futhi bakwazi ukushaya umkakhe ngaphandle kokuzisola kuze kube sekufeni.
Ukuqhubeka kulokhu, izazi zengqondo zikhomba izizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani indoda ishaya umkakhe:
- ukucasulwa owesifazane;
- izakhi zofuzo;
- ukuphuza utshwala;
- ukuzihlonipha emndenini;
- izingane ezinokwethenjelwa, lapho zonke izifiso zomfana zigcwaliseka ngegama lokuqala "Ngifuna".
Yini okufanele ngiyenze uma umyeni wami engishaya?
Izazi zengqondo zeluleka ukuhlaziya isimo samanje, ukuthola ukuthi kungani indoda ishaya. Akukhona ngaso sonke isikhathi ubuhlukumezi bomuntu obuvela kuleso simo. Zama ukukhuluma ngokuthula nomngane wakho womshado. Uma ingxoxo ingaxazululanga inkinga, zama ukuxhumana nomqondo wengqondo womndeni. Uma ufuna ukugcina umndeni, khumbula ukuthi uthando ngeke lukusize ukuba uphinde ufundise umuntu, kuphela isazi sezengqondo ngokusizwa ukulungiswa kwengqondo komyeni wakho kungakwazi ukuqeda udlame lomndeni.
Udlame lwasekhaya - yini okufanele uyenze?
Izazi zengqondo zincoma ukwephula ubuhlobo nomuntu uma umndeni ubona ukusetshenziswa kobudlova. Kodwa akuwona wonke owesifazane olungele ukuguqula impilo yakhe, ukushiya umyeni wakhe wesibindi. Ungazami ukulinganisa izenzo zomyeni wakho, ungaphenduli izicelo zokubuyela, ungakholelwa ezithembisweni zekusasa elingcono. Uma kungenjalo, ezinsukwini ezimbalwa uzozisola ngokuthi awutholanga amandla okushintsha impilo yakho.
Udlame lwasekhaya olubhekiswe kwabesifazane, kuphi?
Kulesi simo, kufanele uxhumane namaphoyisa, imizimba yenkonzo yomphakathi. Kubalulekile ukuthi kukhona izinto eziqinisekisa ubudlova basekhaya - umsindo, ividiyo. Bese uvakashela isikhungo sosizo lwezomthetho, landela zonke izeluleko zomthetho. Kunamanye amabandla ahilelekile ezinyathelo zokuvimbela ukuxhaphazwa:
- amaphoyisa obugebengu kubantwana;
- iziphathimandla zokugcinwa;
- izikhungo ezikhethekile zezisulu zobudlova;
- izikhungo eziphuthumayo zezisulu zobudlova;
- izikhungo zezinsizakalo zenhlalakahle ebusheni.