Ulimi lomzimba luyisigijimi esikhombisiwe mayelana nokuthi umuntu uzizwa kanjani, kunjani isimo. Ukwazi izinto eziyisisekelo zokukhulumisana okungakhulumi kukusiza ukuba wazi kangcono ngokwakho, umngane wakho, kanye nososayensi bezengqondo baxhuma kumaklayenti wakho, okusiza ukwakha ukwethenjwa.
Lisho ukuthini ulimi lomzimba?
Ulimi lomzimba luyi-psychology, njengoba isayensi ifakazela ukubaluleka okukhulu kulezi zenzakalo. Phakathi nokuguquka kwesintu, ulimi lomzimba lushintsha kuye ngokuthi i-ethnos, kodwa ukuzithokozisa okuningi nesimo sobuso kubonakala kubantu bomhlaba wonke. Iyini igama lolimi lomzimba? Izazi zengqondo zanikeza leli gama ngalolu daba - ukukhulumisana okungekho amazwi. Ulimi lomzimba ukudluliselwa kolwazi ngokusebenzisa izimpawu ezingekho amazwi: ukuzithokozisa, ukubonakala kwesibindi, i-gait.
Umehluko phakathi kolimi lomzimba nokukhuluma ngomlomo
Ulimi olungenalutho lomzimba lulimi oluqotho nolulalekile, kunzima ukuluhlanganisa ngokugcwele, futhi uma umuntu olula onolwazi oluncane engase angaqapheli inkohliso, ukungabi khona kwe-synchronism ngeke kuhlonzwe ngugqirha. Umehluko phakathi kwesistimu yezandla ezingenayo kanye nezwi elilodwa:
- Ulimi lomzimba nezenzo ziningi kakhulu zasendulo.
- Ukukhulumisana ngokuzwakalayo kusebenzisa umsindo, inkulumo, nokuxhumana okungenamazwi kuqukethe i-spectrum ecebile futhi kuhlanganisa:
- isibonakaliso sobuso;
- ukuthinta;
- i-pantomime ;
- ukuxhumana okubukwayo;
- ukukhala;
- ithoni, isithingi, ububanzi bezwi (paralinguistics);
- ukuyeka ukuxoxa, ukuhleka, ukukhala (extralinguistics).
Ulimi lomzimba nezenzo - psychology
Ulimi lomzimba kanye nezenzo zomzimba zamukelwa izazi ze-psychologists, ochwepheshe be-NLP abagxile emininingwaneni engekho emlomo evela kumuntu "funda" umuntu njengekhadi. I-gypsy hypnosis edumile kanye nokubikezela okumangazayo kusekelwe ekutheni amaGypsies ayinkosikazi yokufunda ulimi lomzimba. Lolu hlobo lwolwazi luyadingeka kuwo wonke umuntu ofisa ukwazi yena nabanye, lokhu kungasiza ekugwemeni amaphutha, "ukukhanya" ezintweni eziningi.
Imithetho yokuhumusha ulimi lomzimba
Ulimi lomzimba lusitshela ukuthini? Mayelana nezinto eziningi, kodwa udinga ukukhumbula ukuthi ukudonsa uhlobo oluthile lwe-pose, isenzo, ukulinganisa inkulumo kusuka kumongo ojwayelekile akukwazi ukwenza ukucabanga kwangempela, kuyoba khona "mayelana". Kukhona imithetho yokufunda ulimi lomzimba:
- Ubudala bomuntu, ubuchwepheshe, isikhundla sibeka izimpawu zawo emzimbeni womzimba - ingane inomsebenzi omncane, ukubonisa okuningi ukubonakalisa, kumuntu omdala, ukugcizelela kuthuthukisiwe kakhulu.
- Ukuhlukunyezwa okukhulu noma ukungabi khona kwalo akusho ukuthi umuntu unomzwelo kakhulu noma ngokubanda kakhulu. Abantu abafunde kakhulu abanolwazi oluningi abadingi ukuguqulwa ngokweqile, ukuze baziveze, ngakho bangabheka ngokomzwelo enkulumweni ecebile, kodwa lokhu akusilo njalo.
- Ukuhlanganiswa okugcwele kwekulumo, ukubonakala komzimba, ukubekezela, ukuthinta-ukungabi khona kwe-synchronicity kubonisa ukuthi umuntu, into efihlekile, akafuni ukuveza, amanga.
Ulimi lomzimba - ukuhamba kwesikhathi
Ukukhulumisana okungekho emlomo kwembula umuntu kangcono kunomhumushi wezwi, ukuxhumana nabanye, ukuqonda kwethu ngokushesha kunomlando othola idatha yomuntu siqu, kodwa lokhu akugcini njalo ngokuqaphela ukuqonda, ngoba abantu abaningi bazi umuzwa lapho kukhona into enjengomuntu omuhle okhuluma naye, kodwa into ethile kukhona okungcolile noma okungafaneleki kuwo - konke lokhu ngoba ingqondo engaqondakali yaqaphela lokho ingqondo engayiboni. Ngokufunda ngokucophelela izakhi zokukhulumisana okungenamazwi, umuntu angakwazi ukuhumusha ubuntu bomuntu.
Incazelo yesimo somuntu esikhala:
- ikhanda "lihlanganiswe" ezindlebeni ezivulekile, izimbambo zikhona etafuleni - ulimi lomzimba lwentombazane ofuna ukubonakala ngendoda egumbini lifuna ukubukeka likhangele;
- ukuwela izandla esifubeni "pretzel" - uthango, ukungeniswa, ukubonakaliswa kokungaqiniseki;
- ukuqina - umuntu esimweni sokuvikelwa;
- ubuyele kumxhumanisi-ukungathandi ukuxhumana;
- isandla sithatha isifuba sakhe - isithukuthezi, ukungabi nentshisekelo;
- inhloko ithambekele ekuxhumaniseni - izwa isithakazelo esiqotho engxoxweni.
Ulimi lomzimba - inkulumo ebusweni
Indlela yokuqonda ulimi lomzimba, ngezinye izikhathi kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthola ulwazi oluthembekile ngomuntu, ungayilungisa ukuze kungabikho muntu ongabaza ubuqotho besiphakamiso, kodwa ungakhohlwa ukuthi umzimba uhlala "ngesigqi saso futhi ubonisa ngokucacile isimo sangempela somuntu. Yini ebonisa isibonakaliso sobuso:
- amehlo avulekile, amashiya aphakama phezulu, futhi izingxenyana zezindebe zivame ukwehla - lowo muntu uyamangala;
- amehlo amancane, izindebe ziqinile ngokucindezela - isibonakaliso sentukuthelo;
- iso elingapheli, amashiya ahlanganiswa ndawonye, ikhanda liyancipha - ukudabuka, usizi ludla umuntu;
- ukumamatheka komunye umkhawulo wezindebe - i-grin, ukungakholwa;
- ukumomotheka ngezindebe zomuntu ngaphandle kokubandakanyeka kweso - ukungaqiniseki.
Ulimi lomzimba - ukunyakaza
Ulimi lomzimba nomzimba kuyathandeka kakhulu ukuyibuka ezinamandla-kungatshela okuningi ngezinto eziningi. Izakhi zolimi lomzimba, ukuhumusha kokunyakaza:
- umdlalo ngezithupha, isifiso sokubafaka esikhwameni sejacket noma ibhulukwe - ngokuvamile amadoda enza lapho efuna ukukhombisa ukuphakama kwabo, uphawu lokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili, ukuzidla;
- ukuthinta wena, ukuhlobisa - ukukhathazeka, ukungaqiniseki, ukuzama ukuzola;
- ukubukela ngehora, ifoni ephathekayo, ukuhamba ngezinyawo - isithukuthezi, ukungapheli, isifiso sokushiya;
- Ukuxubha kwamehlo kukhuluma ngokukhathala;
- ukushaya isikhumba - ukugxila, ukucabanga ngento ethile;
- umkhawulo wesundu uhamba "ukusika" ukunyakaza - ukungapheli, ukuhlukumezeka.
Ulimi lomzimba ngokudansa
Ngomdanso, njengoba kungekho ulimi oluthile lomphefumulo nomzimba obonisa isimo. Kusukela ezikhathini zasendulo, umdanso uqobo uqobo wawunqatshelwe ukukhuluma futhi kwakungenzeka ukufaka umyalezo ngesimo sokunyakaza komzimba. Bonisa ngokucacile uhla lwezintandokazi ezihlukahlukene ezidumile zamaNdiya, lapho owesifazane eveza imizwa yakhe ngokusebenzisa izinkulungwane ze-micromovements ngamehlo, izandla, futhi ejika ikhanda lakhe. Umdanso uzokutshela okuningi. Abamele iqhaza elihle lomuntu namadoda nabo banesithakazelo embuzweni: indlela yokubona ulimi lomzimba kumdanso womabili nokuqonda umlingani noma umlingani wakho?
Kunomzimba womzimba ofihliwe kumdanso:
- ukuxhaphaza izandla, ukudonsa iminwe yakhe ngaphandle kwezimpawu - ukuthi umlingani ubambe ngesandla sakhe ngokuqinile;
- isandla sisuswe ehlombe lomlingani uma uxhumane osondelene - ungakhululekile, udinga isikhala esengeziwe, kubalulekile ukukhulula ukwamukelwa;
- umzimba womzimba womlingani ukuze ulwele ukuvuma okukhulu - isifiso sokusondelana;
- ingoma iphelile, futhi oxhumana naye uqhubeka - kufana nokuba nomlingani, ufuna ukudansa.
Ulimi lomzimba nomlingiswa
Amabhuku mayelana nolimi lomzimba abhalwe ochwepheshe abacwaninga ngokuziphatha kwabantu, ikakhulukazi izazi ze-psychologists, izazi ze-psychotherapists ezibheke emzimbeni, i-NLP -ers - ziyingcweti ekubonakalweni okungelona amazwi omuntu othi ulimi lomzimba luhlotshaniswa nombuso, imizwa okwamanje, nokunye kubangela futhi ukulingisa ukubonakaliswa komlingiswa.
Isibonelo, umuntu uhlale enganelisekile ngento ethile, evame ukucasula, isenzo esibhekene naye ebusweni kuyoba: ukunciphisa kwamashiya, ngisho nobunzima ebunzini, ukwakheka kwezindebe, ubuso njengobumba obusindile - ngakho-ke umlingiswa ubhalwe ebusweni. Kuboniswe ukuthutha: amahlombe anciphisa, abuyele emuva. Umuntu ojabule - inkulumo yakhe ebusweni ivulekile: ukumomotheka okuqotho, hhayi ukusulwa "kusukela endlebeni kuya endlebeni", kodwa ukuzama ukukhanya kwamehlo. Amahlombe avulekile, umhlane uqondile, ukubukeka kunomusa futhi ngisho namehlo ayamamatheka.
Ulimi lomzimba wesifazane
Isithombe esiphezulu solimi olungelona amazwi ngamazwi asesilisa nakwabesifazane, esizibonakalisa ezimweni ezicindezelayo, konke kusemhlabeni wonke lapha. Ulimi oluqondile lomzimba wesifazane luba, lapho ubulili obuhle emkhakheni wokubukwa bufika kumuntu okhangayo futhi ulimi lomzimba luhilela ukudalulwa kobulili besifazane . Indlela ebonakala ngayo:
- ukuziphatha kuyaba yinto ehlukumezayo noma ethandanayo (hhayi njalo);
- ngesikhatsi umlingo ugoqa izinkalo zakhe;
- uphonsa umlenze ube ukuma kwesimo somlenze;
- uhlwitha amehlo akhe;
- ukubukeka okunamahloni, amehlo aqhekekile, abafundi bahlanza;
- udlala indlebe endlebeni, isihlangu emlenzeni wakhe;
- uthinta izinwele, uphefumule i-strand emunwe;
- uthinta ngengozi;
- uveza kancane izingxenye zomzimba (uphakamisa umkhonto, umphetho wengubo);
- uvame ukubopha izindebe zakhe, ubukeka esibukweni.
Indlela yokufunda ulimi lomzimba?
Ukuqaphela umkhuba wansuku zonke oyosiza ukubona ukuthi umuntu, ngaphandle kwamagama, uzibeka ngokwakhe. Ngisho nokubona okungenasici, ungabona ukuthi ulimi lwesifazane lomzimba nokuthinta luhlukile kobulili. Yini enye ebalulekile? Ngaphandle kokwazi ngokwakho, ulimi lomzimba wakho, kunzima ukufunda ukuhumusha abanye - konke kuqala ngokutholakala komuntu siqu. Esikhathini esizayo, lapho ukhuluma nabanye abantu, kubalulekile ukugxila ekubonisweni komuntu okungezona amazwi: isikhundla endaweni, ukumomotheka, isenzo.
Ulimi lomzimba - izincwadi
Kulabo abanesithakazelo esikhulu sokuthi umuntu uziveza kanjani ngokunyakaza komzimba, isibonakaliso sobuso nesenzo, umuntu angakwazi ukutadisha izincwadi ezifanele futhi aqale ukuqapha abantu ngokucophelela. Ulimi lomzimba nezenzo - psychology, izincwadi ezinconywa ukufundwa:
- " Ulimi lomzimba ". I-ABC yokuziphatha kwabantu J. Fast. Le ncwadi inentshisekelo yokwazi ulwazi, ungakwazi ukulandelela ukuthi umzimba uphendukela kanjani ezimweni ezihlukahlukene, bheka ukuthi "izikhalazo" zayo, umbhali uphinde alethe ukungezwani emisebenzini yabantu abahlukene, okuzoba usizo kulabo abathanda ukuhamba kwamanye amazwe.
- " Ngiyabona ukuthi ucabangani ngalokhu. " D. Navarro. Umbhali wencwadi unomlando omude womsebenzi ku-FBI futhi uyazi cishe konke ngokuziphatha komuntu. Kunakekelwa kakhulu ngendlela yokuqaphela amanga ngokusebenzisa ukuxhumana okungekho amazwi.
- " Ulimi lwezandla. Indlela yokufunda imicabango ngaphandle kwamagama. 49 imithetho elula "O. Sergeeva. Ezimweni ezihlukene, umuntu uzambulela ezisekelweni ezahlukene, futhi umzimba wakhe ukhuluma ngokucacile ngalokho okuyiyo manje umnikazi wayo. Amagama abizwa yi-20%, iphoyinti le-iceberg, kanye nezenzo nokunyakaza kwama-80% - kuzo zonke iqiniso.
- " Ulimi lomzimba kubaholi " G.K. Kinsey. Kulabo abafuna ukuthuthukisa ukuzithemba ngokwabo futhi bakhuthaze abanye ukuba bathemba ngokwabo, ukuthi baziphathe kanjani ekuxoxweni, enkampanini, ukubona abanye ukuthi bangumuntu onjani, le ncwadi edayiswa kakhulu.
- "Ulimi olusha lwezenzo ." I-version enwetshiwe A. Pease, B. Pease. Abalobi bencwadi, odokotela bezengqondo ezidumile abanomkhuba oneminyaka engu-20 ubudala baye bafunda abantu abaningi ezimweni ezihluke kakhulu, ngakho-ke, ulimi lomzimba womuntu luyisikhathi eside luyimfihlakalo kubo.