Akuwona wonke amahle angaziqhayisa ngobuhlobo obujabulisayo nomshado omuhle, ngoba lokhu kudinga okungaphezu kwedatha engokwemvelo engenakufinyeleleka. Yini ngempela edingekayo ukunqoba inhliziyo yomuntu? Ake sibone.
Amathiphu wokuthi ungayinqoba kanjani uthando lomuntu
Uma sicabanga ngendlela yokunqoba uthando lomuntu, sifuna ukuthola indlela evumela ukuthi noma yiluphi ilungu lezocansi ezinamandla ukuholela ezinyaweni ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka. Kodwa, ngeshwa, akukho iresiphi yendawo yonke, kuzo zonke izici ezithile kuzodingeka ukuthi ufune indlela yakho yokukhohlisa . Yiqiniso, izimfihlo zabesifazane, indlela yokunqoba inhliziyo yomuntu, sebenze cishe njalo, kepha akubona bonke abakwaziyo ukusebenzisa.
- Isibonelo, wonke owesifazane uyazi ukuthi enye yezindlela ezithandekayo ukuthi ungashesha kanjani ukuthandwa ngumuntu ukumbamba ngokubonakala kwakhe. Kulungile, kodwa amantombazane athile akholelwa ukuthi izimonyo eziningi, zingcono. Kodwa akekho othanda ukungabi namvelo okwanele ukulahlekelwa ikhanda lakhe. Abanye abameleli bobulili obuhle bayazi ukuthi isilinganiso, kodwa bakhohlwa ukugcina "umlando". Indoda ingase ingaboni ushintsho lwekhanda, uma lihambisana nesithombe, kodwa ukushintshwa kwesayizi lesine lesifuba ngesibini elihle ngenxa ye-push-up engaphumeleli, ngokuqinisekile ngeke yamukele ngokuthokoza. Ngakho-ke, uma uzakhele isithombe, unamathele ngaso sonke isikhathi ngenkathi ukhona nendoda ayithandayo. Okunye okuwukuthi, ukuba ubuhle obuhle akulula, uma kufanele ubole imali yokuthenga enye into, ngakho-ke kulokhu akufanele uqale? Ekugcineni, kubalulekile ukuthi abesifazane babheke kahle, hhayi isikhangiso sokuhamba sezimpahla ezidumile zokugqoka.
- I-Psychology inikeza impendulo kumbuzo wokuthi ungamnqoba kanjani umuntu, udinga nje ukumenza abe nomuzwa wokubaluleka kwakhe, isibonelo, ungamcela ukuthi asize (achaze) esimweni aqonde ngaso. Kodwa ngezinye izikhathi amantombazane awela ngale ndlela, aphenduke ezimpumputhe ezingenasici. Ukucasuka okunjalo kungenzeka, kunokuba ujabule. Yiqiniso, akekho kithi ophelele, futhi ungase ungayiqondi umbuzo othile, kodwa kufanele ube nempumelelo okungenani kwenye into. Uma kungenjalo, ekhanga ukubukeka okuhle, indoda idumazeke ngokushesha - ama-dummies ayathandeki, futhi abesifazane ngokwabo abakasheshi ukukhetha indoda enezinga eliphansi lokuhlakanipha ezimpilweni zabo.
- Akwanele ukunqoba indoda, udinga ukwazi, nokuthi ungamgcina kanjani, abesifazane abaningi bayaqiniseka ukuthi bayazi kahle ukuthi umlingani wabo udinga yini. Ababona ubuvila ukupheka ukudla kwasekuseni, ukudla kwasemini kanye nokudla kwabalithembekile babo, becela izikhathi ezingu-10 ngosuku, noma ngabe badle. Ukunakekelwa kuboniswa ngesifiso sokugqoka othandekayo wabo, futhi ngokuvamile umbiza, ulawula zonke izinyathelo. Abanye abantu bacabanga ukuthi akukho lutho olungalungile ngalokhu, kodwa uma ubheka isimo kusuka ekubukeni kwengqondo yezobudlelwane , kuyacaca ukuthi ngale ndlela ngeke uwunqobe umuntu, ngoba ngokukhathazeka kwakho ugcizelele kuphela ukuntuleka kwakhe ukuzimela futhi unciphise inkululeko yakhe. Futhi akekho umuntu ozobekezela ukuthi wayebhekwa njengento engelutho, futhi, ngaphezu kwalokho, waxoshwa endaweni yakhe yokuphila kangaka. Ngakho-ke, ukhathalela kufanele kube ngokulinganisela, ungakuphendulele ekugcineni, ngemuva kwakho konke, indoda yakho ikhulile isikhathi eside esiphuthumayo futhi uzokwazi ukuthi yini okufanele uyidle, nokuthi yini okufanele uyigqoke.
- Ukuhlala esidlekeni senhliziyo yomuntu akudingeki ukuba ube nguprofesa wezibalo, kodwa kuyadingeka ukuba ube nokuhlakanipha kowesifazane. Kumele uqonde ngokucacile ukuthi nini okufanele ukhulume (futhi ngumuphi umzuzu ukulalela kuphela), indlela yokuziphatha nommeleli othize wezocansi ezinamandla. Isibonelo, insizwa ekhululekile ngemuva kwesikhathi esithile sokuzijwayele, cishe, iyocasuka uma ungamvumeli empilweni yakho. Kodwa uma ucabanga ukuthi ungayinqoba kanjani inhliziyo yendoda eshadile, ke ngokuphambene, izinkinga zakho azizenzi lutho, ngokwakho ngokwanele. Futhi-ke,
mayelana nesimo sengqondo esihle futhi ukumomotheka, futhi, akudingeki ukhohlwe - ubuso obumnyama buyenza noma yimuphi owesifazane omuhle nakakhulu.
Futhi iseluleko esiyinhloko kubo bonke abafuna ukwazi ukunqoba indoda, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi bashadile, bahlukanisile noma bangakaze bajabulele umshado, akufanele bathathe igama elithi "ukunqoba" ngokoqobo. Akudingekile ukwenza izenzo eziye zacatshangwa ukuthi ziyizikhundla zabantu (ukuze zithole inyanga kusuka esibhakabhakeni, zigcwalise ngezipho, ukuphonsela abaphikisi), ungazishiyi phansi kwehla lokugcina wesifazane, elisezweni lethu lobukazi kukhona iphutha elikhulu. Kungcono ube ngokwakho, ukuzivikela okuncane, okumnandi nokunene, bonisa ukuthi udinga ukufeza futhi uzuze - ngaphambi kokuba ithuba lokuncintisana lomklomelo oyinhloko ngeke lime.