Ngeshwa, isimo lapho owesifazane engazi ukuthi benzeni, uma ethandana nomuntu oshadile, akuyona into engavamile. Ubulili obuhle kakhulu abuqondi kahle ukuthi ungaxazulula kanjani inkinga efanayo futhi uyeke ukuzilimaza.
Kuthiwani uma ngithanda indoda eshadile?
Okokuqala, unqume ukuthi usulungele yini ukuyeka imizwa yakho, noma, ngokuphambene nalokho, ufuna ukuchitha umshado wakhe noma ube inkosikazi, kuye ngokuthi impendulo yakho, udinga ukuthuthukisa isu lokuziphatha.
Sizohlaziya zonke izinketho zalokho okufanele ukwenze uma uthandana nendoda eshadile.
Inketho eyodwa - ufuna ukukhohlwa konke. Kulesi simo, upheleke empilweni yomfana kuze kube phakade, ungasho lutho "ngaphandle kokubona - ngaphandle kwengqondo", futhi zama:
- Gcwalisa sonke isikhathi sakho samahhala. Akunandaba ukuthi wenzani wena, okubaluleke kakhulu, ungalali embhedeni futhi ungahlupheki.
- Qaphela imizwa yakho. Ukwenqaba ukuthanda, umuntu uhlangabezana nemizwelo eminingi ehlukene, ukuzihawukela, ukwehla kokuzethemba, intukuthelo, intukuthelo nokunye okuningi. Batshengise ngokukhuluma nomqondo wezengqondo, umngane oseduze noma nje kwidayari yomuntu siqu.
- Ungazivimbeli ukukhulula okungalungile. Ufuna ukukhala - ukukhala, ufuna ukushaya izitsha - shaya. Okuwukuphela kwakho akudingeki ukwenze ukuba ngamahlaya omphakathi nokuveza imizwa yakho kubathandekayo bakho, ngakho-ke uma sekuphezu kwakho ngeke uzidumise ngokuziphatha okunjalo.
Option ezimbili, usukulungele ukulwa. Izazi zengqondo zinikeza iseluleko esilandelayo ngalokho okufanele ukwenze kowesifazane othi - Ngiyamthanda indoda eshadile futhi angiyikulilahla:
- Kumele ube yizici zezimfanelo azithandayo emantombazaneni, khumbula ukuthi ngokungazi ukuthi uzokuqhathanisa nomkakhe, futhi lokhu kuqhathaniswa kufanele kukuthande.
- Qala ukwakha ubuhlobo obuseduze nomuntu, thola into ejwayelekile noma into yokuzilibazisa naye. Isikhathi esiningi osichitha ndawonye nokukhulumisana, ukuphakama izinga lokuthembela kwakho komunye nomunye nokubona komfana ukuthi wabelana ngemibono yakhe empilweni.
- Ungaguquli umngane, njalo ugcizelele ubulili bakho kanye nobukhulu bakhe, kungenjalo ubungozi uba "isoka lakho."