Ubuhlobo bobulili buhamba ngaphesheya kobulili obuvamile phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane. Ezweni lanamuhla, abantu abakunqikazi ukuveza izifiso zabo zangempela ukuze bajabulele ngokugcwele injabulo yobulili. I-BDSM yaba yithandwa kakhulu ngemuva kokukhishwa kwefilimu "ama-shades ama-50 we-gray".
Kusho ukuthini i-BDSM?
Uhlobo olukhethekile lomdlalo odlala indima, ngokusekelwe kokushintshaniswa kwamandla kanye nezinye izinhlobo zobudlelwano bocansi . Ukwaneliseka kutholakala ngokulawulwa noma ukuzithoba embhedeni. Ukuqonda ukuthi yiyiphi i-BDSM, kufanele kuqaphele ukuthi abahlanganyeli kule nsimu sebenzisa imithetho eqinile eqinisekisa ukuphepha.
Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi i-BDSM inqunywe kanjani ukuze kuqondwe kangcono umqondo walesi siqondiso, ngoba ihlanganisa izimiso ezintathu eziyisisekelo:
- BD - ubugqila nesiyalo . Lokhu kuhlanganisa izinhlobo ezahlukene zokubophezela nokuhamba kwemikhawulo, kanye nokuqondiswa kwezigwegwe kanye nemidlalo yokudlala.
- I-DS iyinhloko futhi ihlonipha . Ubuhlobo bobulili, lapho isivumelwano ngokungafani khona kwabalingani.
- I-SM - i-sadism ne-masochism . Izenzo ezehlukene ezijabulisa ukudala noma ukuzwa ubuhlungu obungokwenyama.
I-BDSM njenge-subculture
Le samanje inenani elikhulu lezinkombandlela ongakhetha ngazo izintandokazi zabahlanganyeli. Bangakwazi, kanjani ukuhlanganisa, futhi bahlale behlukana. Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ukuthi amadoda angu-71% nabesifazane abangu-11% abanezilinganiso zokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili abesilisa nabesifazane bakhetha indima ebalulekile, kanti amadoda angu-29% nabesifazane abangu-89% bathanda ukuba ngaphansi.
Imikhuba ye-BDSM ihlanganisa ukusetshenziswa kwezimfanelo ezahlukene, isibonelo, izinto ezenziwe ngesikhumba, i-latex, insimbi nokunye. Okuthandwa kakhulu yizinto ezihloselwe umthelela ongokomzimba kumuntu: imivimbo, ukugcina izinto nokuningi okuningi. I-subculture BDSM inezibonakaliso zayo, esekelwe uphawu lobudala lwe-triskelion. Ukuba khona kwezintathu ezintathu kuhlobene ngokuqondile nemigomo emithathu yalesi siqondiso.
Izinhlobo ze-BDSM
Izinhlobonhlobo eziyinhloko zobudlelwane bobulili obubonakalayo zikhonjisiwe ekufinyeleleni kwayo futhi kufanelekile ukukhuluma ngazo ngokuningiliziwe.
- Isibambiso nesiyalo . Omunye wabalingani babo uhlelwe ngamasevisi ahlukene ngeso elilodwa. Abaningi babona i-BDSM njengobuciko, ngakho abakhokheli bazama ukuxhuma lo mlingani ngendlela enhle kunabo bonke, ngokombono wabo, njalo. Ukusebenzisa ubugqila kungabantu kuphela abathembela ngokuphelele, ngoba kusetha amandla aphelele okungaqiniseki okuphelele komunye umuntu.
- Ukunciphisa nokubusa . Izindima ezinjalo azisebenzisi ubudlelwane BDSM kuphela, nazo zisebenza ekuphileni okuvamile. Abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi okuvelele nokuzithoba kuyisimo sengqondo sabantu .
- AmaMasochism nokudabuka . Lolu hlobo lusho ukuthi kubangele umlingani ocansi ocansini ngokomzwelo noma ngokomzimba. I-masochist ithola injabulo ngokuthi iyagula, futhi i-sadist - kusukela ekusebenziseni ubuhlungu. Ungakwazi ukuletha ukuhlukumeza ngezindlela ezehlukene futhi ukuzwa kungase kube nokuhluka okuhlukile. Kumele kuthiwa "i-sadomasochism yengqondo" ihlukaniswa ngokuhlukile, isibonelo, lapho indoda ishintsha, futhi owesifazane uzizwa enjabulo ukwazi.
Iyini i-BDSM ebulili?
Ukuze uqonde kangcono lesi siqondiso socansi, kubalulekile ukuthi ufunde izimiso ezintathu eziyisisekelo:
- Ukuphepha. Ukubuswa kwe-BDSM kusho ulwazi lwezinto ezisisekelo ze-anatomy, imithi kanye ne-physiology ukuze izindlela zokwaneliseka zisetshenziselwe ukulimaza.
- Ubungcwele. Isimiso sibonisa ukuthi abalingani bangasebenzisa kuphela lezo zindlela abazazi ngazo.
- Ukuzithandela. Bobabili abalingani kufanele bavumelane noxhumana naye we-BDSM, futhi kusabalulekile ukusebenzisa igama lokuyeka, okudingekayo ukuba izithobe ukuyeka inqubo nganoma isiphi isikhathi.
Yini ehlanganisiwe ku-BDSM?
Bobabili abalingani kumele baqonde izinhlobonhlobo zalesi siqondiso, ukuze baqale babone okuthakazelisayo nokuthi yini ehlabayo. Kulabo abanesithakazelo kulokho okungenziwa ku-BDSM, sizohlinzeka ngezinhlobo ezithandwa kakhulu oxhumana nabo:
- Ukuthotshiswa kokuziphatha, okushiwo isicelo ngokuphathelene nomlingani wamazwi ahlukahlukene angcolile nesilulumagama esihlambalazayo.
- Ukufakela uphawu - ukushaya ngezandla noma izinto ezihlukahlukene ezinyaweni, esifubeni, ubuso, izintambo ngisho nezitho zangasese.
- Imikhawulo enkululeko yomlingani okubophayo, ukulenga nokunye okusetshenziselwayo kuyasetshenziswa.
- Imidlalweni yokudlala ngokusekelwe ekuhlazulweni komlingani, isibonelo, isimo sabazali-izingane, u-boss-ngaphansi, nokudlwengulwa kusasa kakhulu.
- Ukususwa komuntu wokubona, ukuzwa noma ukuhogela ngosizo lwezinhlobonhlobo ezahlukene, izindlebe ze-earplugs nezinye izindlela.
- Abantu abaningi banesithakazelo kulokho okudingekayo ku-BDSM, ngakho-ke enye yezinhlobo ezithandwa kakhulu ihilela ukusetshenziswa kwamakhandlela ukushisa umlingani nge-wax namalangabi. Ngokuvamile imidlalo esetshenzisiwe negesi, ethinta izingono nezitho zangasese.
Ungazama kanjani i-BDSM?
Abaqalayo abafuna ukuzama izinzwa ezintsha kudingeka bazi futhi bacabange ngeminye imithetho:
- Okokuqala udinga ukunquma ukuthi yimiphi imizwa ofuna ukuyithola, yini eyamukelekayo, futhi yini engavunyelwe. Qinisekisa ukuthi ucabangela lezi zimiso ezintathu eziyisisekelo zalesi sihlahla.
- Bobabili abalingani kufanele baqaphele i-BDSM, futhi ukuba khona kwethemba kubaluleke kakhulu. Kubalulekile ukunquma ukuthi ubani ozolalela nokuthi ngubani oyobusa.
- Khetha igama lokumisa, okufanele lingathathi hlangothi futhi licacise kubo bobabili abahlanganyeli besenzo.
- Ukwazi ukuthi yisiphi isifinyezo se-BDSM, ungakwazi ukuqagela ukuthi ngesikhathi senqubo, abaningi banomlutha, okuvame ukuholela ekubukeni kwemivimbo kanye nezinye ukulimala. Kungcono ukubhala ngaphambili iskripthi sesenzo.
Ungazibandakanya kanjani ku-BDSM?
Abaningi abasha abavame ukuphindaphinda amasu ahlukene abonakala ku-porn noma afunde esidlangalaleni, kodwa kungcono ukuqala amancane nokuqonda konke isinyathelo ngesinyathelo. Kulabo abanesithakazelo sendlela yokwenza kahle i-BDSM, sinikeza izinketho eziningana zabaqalayo:
- Ukubopha izandla . Lena yindlela elula yokuthuthukisa imizwa. Udinga nje ukubopha izandla zakho ngemuva kwekhanda lakho bese umlingani ezwa izinzwa ezintsha. Kubalulekile ukuthi ungagcini izandla zakho futhi ungasebenzisi izintambo ezenziwe ngezinto zokwakha.
- Amageyimu anezinga lokushisa . Kungcono ukugxila emkhatsini wokushisa. Isibonelo, ungenza ukushisa okufudumele, bese usebenzisa i-cube ye-ice. Abaqalayo abaxwayiswa ukuthatha i-wax eshisayo nezinto zensimbi ezishisayo.
- Ukushaya . Abantu abazi ukuthi yi-BDSM, baqonde ukuthi okuthiwa i-flip flops evamile. Kubalulekile ukucabangela imithetho emithathu eyisisekelo. Okokuqala udinga ukufudumala umzimba, ngakho-ke ukuhlunga kokuqala kufanele kube buthaka. Gxila ezindaweni ezifanayo, ukwandisa amandla omthelela. Umthetho wesibili ubonisa ukuhambisana nesigqi. Ekupheleni kwenkambiso, udinga ukugcoba izintambo ngomkhiqizo nge-panthenol, okuzosiza isikhumba ukuba siphume ngokushesha.
Ungasusa kanjani ukuxhomeka kwe-BDSM?
Kukhona abantu abathinta ubuhlobo bobulili obuqala ukuhlupha, bese kubalulekile ukuthola indlela ongabhekana ngayo nokulutha.
- Ukuqaphela inkinga kuyisinyathelo sokuqala ekuxazululeni. Kukhona ngisho namaqembu akhethekile adalwa ukusiza omunye nomunye.
- Ngezinye izikhathi ubudlelwane be-BDSM, njengezibopho, zivimbela umuntu futhi anganiki ithuba lokujabulela ezinye izinto. Kulesi simo kungcono ukuthola isazi sengqondo esazibonele esingathola impande yenkinga.
- Kunconywa ukuthi zonke izinto ezihlobene nocansi zisuswe endlini ukuze kungabi nesilingo.
- Udinga ukuhambisa amandla akho kwesinye isiteshi, ukuze yonke imicabango ithathwe ibhizinisi elisha.