Ubuhlobo bamahhala phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane noma abantu bobulili obufanayo buba yindawo evamile. Amanethiwekhi omphakathi, izingosi zokuphola kwenza kube lula ukuthola umlingani wobudlelwane ngaphandle kwezibopho, ukuzama ukukhula okuphezulu komsebenzi akushiyi isikhathi sokuba nobuhlobo obunzima - lezi yizinto ezibonakalayo zanamuhla.
Kusho ukuthini "ubudlelwano obukhululekile"?
Ubuhlobo bamahhala - i-psychology ichaza lesi simo njengesifiso sokusebenzisana kwabantu ababili ukwakha ubudlelwane babo ngaphandle kwezibopho komunye nomunye. Lokhu ubuhlobo obuqotho lapho yonke into "ebonakalayo" futhi eqondakalayo, engabandakanyi izimangalo, umhawu nesifiso sokuba nomlingani ngokungafani. Emazweni amaningi, lapho indlela yokuphila yomndeni ikhona khona futhi amasiko anjalo agcinwa, ubudlelwane bekhululekile bubekwe icala futhi kubangele ukulahlwa.
Ubuhlobo bomndeni wamahhala
Ubuhlobo bamahhala emshadweni akuyona into engavamile emphakathini wanamuhla. Umshado womphakathi awubhalisiwe futhi uhlala kuphela ekuthembekeni phakathi kozakwethu, akukho okuvimbela umlingani ukuba aphenduke nganoma yisiphi isikhathi futhi ashiye, akaboshiwe yiziphi izibopho. Kwenzeka kanjalo, emva kweminyaka eminingana yomshado womphakathi, lo mbhangqwana uthatha isinqumo sokubhalisa ubudlelwane bawo ngokusemthethweni, futhi awudluli futhi bahlukanisile unyaka. Ukuphazamiseka okunjalo. Umzwelo wenkululeko wahlanganisa ukusebenzisana okunjalo, futhi ukudluliselwa kwesimo sezomthetho kwaholela ekubhujisweni.
Ingabe kufanele ngixazulule ubudlelwane obuvulekile?
Indlela yokuqonda ubudlelwane obuvulekile nokuthi ngabe kufanelekile ukungena kuwo? Lokhu kukhetha komuntu wonke umuntu. Kubalulekile ukucabanga, ukuhlola izinzuzo kanye nokungahambi kahle kobudlelwane ngaphandle kwezibopho, futhi uma lokhu okwamanje lokho "udokotela enqunyelwe", ngani? Kubalulekile ukunikeza ngaphambi kokuba sibophezele ukuthi singakhe ukwakha, ngakho-ke ebuhlotsheni bakhululekile umuntu angathola injabulo kanye nesipiliyoni esisha.
Ubuhlobo Bamahhala - izinzuzo nezingozi
Ubuhlobo bamahhala ngaphandle kwezibopho ezifana nanoma yimuphi omunye umphumela wezenhlalakahle banezici zabo ezinhle nezingahle. Izinzuzo zokuxhumana mahhala:
- inkululeko yilowo nalowo ngokwakhe;
- Akukho ukuvalwa (ukuthembela) komunye nomunye, uma nje bobabili abalingani bezwanele ngokwanele futhi banelisekile ngalabo bantu;
- Akekho okhokhelwa lutho kunoma ubani;
- bobabili abalingani bangase babe nabanye ubudlelwane;
- akukho izikhalazo ngokumelene nomunye.
I-minuses yobuhlobo ngaphandle kwezibopho kubangelwa ama-pluses angenhla kanye nama-nuances alandelayo:
- Ubuhlobo bomshado buhlelwe ekwakhiweni kobulili (ukukhanga, intshiseko), mayelana nothando lapha aluhambanga;
- ukulahlwa kwabathandekayo, abangane, umphakathi - ubudlelwano obunjalo buvame ukusola;
- i-fragility;
- ngezinye izikhathi ukukhanga komlingani oyedwa kufana nothando, ngaphandle kokuphindaphindiwe, futhi ukuphumula kuyaba buhlungu ngenxa yothando.
Ubuhlobo bamahhala besifazane
Kungani umfana efuna ubudlelwane mahhala futhi aze abe umuntu ovuthiwe akalweli ukuqina nokuzibophezela, okuyisihluthulelo sobuhlobo obunzima. Ngokwengxenye, lokhu kuchaza inkolelo yesithembu - indoda izama ukuba nabalingani abaningana, lokhu kuyimvelo yakhe. Owesifazane, ubuhlobo bungaba mnandi futhi bukhangele ekuqaleni, lapho imizwa ingakabi khona, kunomtshingo wokuphila kuphela. Ngokungafani namadoda, owesifazane uyisidalwa esisodwa esiyingqayizivele, futhi kubalulekile ukuba azizwe avikelwe, ukuthi ubudlelwano obukhululekile abukwazi ukunikela ngokugcwele.
Indlela yokudlulisa ubudlelwane behhala ebuhlotsheni obungathí sina?
Indoda inikeza ubuhlobo obuvulekile kumacala amaningana:
- akakulungele ubuhlobo obunzima;
- usanda kusinda isahlukaniso ;
- kungokwesigaba sabantu besifazane;
- umsebenzi wakhe uthatha isikhathi esiningi futhi akukho isikhathi sokuba nobuhlobo obuhle;
- unesizungu futhi akadalwanga ubudlelwane obuseduze.
Kuzo zonke lezi zimo kuyoba nzima ukuqondisa ubudlelwane obukhululekile ngendlela efanele, okungajwayelekile lapho ushintsho luvela ngokwemvelo, kubalulekile ukuzama kanzima futhi imizamo akufanele ibe yinkinga. Amathiphu ochwepheshe bezengqondo ukuletha ubudlelwane nezinga elisha, elingathí sina:
- ukuletha umlingani engxoxweni, ukukhuluma ngemizwa yabo ngaye, ngenkathi engamxazululanga, hhayi ukuphatha;
- umnike isikhathi sokwenza isinqumo;
- uma ingxoxo engaqondile ingakusizi, kubalulekile ukuthola ukuthi kungani indoda ifuna ukushiya konke okuyiyo, ulalele izingxabano zakhe;
- baqale ukushintsha futhi bayeke ukugxila ekulindeni kwamadoda, ukubhekana nokuhlukunyezwa kwabo, ukuzihlonipha okuphansi - owesifazane ozithandayo uyathandekayo kakhulu kumuntu, lo akufuni ukulahlekelwa, ngoba yena, futhi ukhula, ukhula.
Ungasho kanjani ukuthi awufuni ubuhlobo obuvulekile?
Isimo sivame uma amantombazane ebuza umbuzo emibuthanweni yengqondo noma yabesifazane: "Umfana uzinikeze ubudlelwane obuvulekile, ngithanda kakhulu, kodwa ngifuna okungaphezulu." Yini okufanele uyenze kulokhu? Uthembekile ukusho ngalokhu ekuqaleni, hhayi ukwakha inkohliso ukuthi ngosizo locansi ungabopha umlingani wakho. Emhlabeni kunomuntu onamanani afanayo.
Indlela yokuqeda ubuhlobo obuvulekile?
Ukwehlukana kobudlelwane obukhulu kulolu hlelo lwesifazane kuyisenzakalo esivamile, amadoda ahlela ubudlelwane obunjalo. Owesifazane ngezinye izikhathi uyavuma ukuba nomuntu ngokwemigomo yakhe, enethemba lokuthi uzokwazi "ukwehlisa" ukuthi uzoba ngumxhomeke kuye, kodwa lokhu akukwenzeki, udumazekile futhi akukho lutho okumele lwenze kodwa akeke ahambe. Indlela yokuqeda ubudlelwane obukhulu obungenasiphakamiso, izincomo:
- vumela isikhathi sokuhlupheka;
- Gwema noma yikuphi ukuxhumana: ungaphenduli izingcingo, imiyalezo, ungahlangani;
- zibeke izinto eziza kuqala, bheka ukubaluleka kokwakha ubudlelwane obuvumelanayo emibhangqwaneni lapho abalingani bebambisana khona futhi balungele ukwakha umndeni ogcwele;
- uma ubuhlobo buye baba yithemba futhi kunzima ukuwuqedela kufanelekile ukucela usizo kumuntu wezengqondo.
Ungathola kanjani umlingani ngobuhlobo obukhululekile?
Ukuthandana kobudlelwane mahhala kuthandwa kakhulu kubantu banobuphi ubudala. Thola umlingani ofanelekayo akulula. "Club of ubudlelwano mahhala" kanye sites okufanayo dating kungatholakala kalula kwi-Inthanethi. Izingosi eziningi, amaqembu ezinkundleni zokuxhumana ezithandwayo zigcwele uhlobo olunjalo lokunikezwa kokukhetha umlingani noma umlingani emihlanganweni.
Amabhayisikobho mayelana nobudlelwano bamahhala
Ezweni lanamuhla, izindinganiso ziyashintsha, futhi uma umshado wangaphambili wawuyingxenye ebalulekile yokuxhumana phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane, namuhla akuyona into ebaluleke kakhulu, abantu abasha balwela ubuhlobo ngaphandle kwezibopho, nabalingani abashadile nabo balwela inkululeko. "Ubuhlobo Bamahhala" - ifilimu ngumqondisi waseJalimane uMichael Herling mayelana nabangani, abangane bomndeni. Ukuphila kwansuku zonke kanye nesimiso ukubeka impendulo yabo ebuhlotsheni kanye nabesilisa banquma ukwenza "pepper" - ukushintshanisa abafazi. Yini ezofika kuyo, ungathola ngokubuka lo comedy.
Amanye amafilimu mahhala, akukho ubuhlobo obubophezelayo:
- " Abangane Bemihlomulo ". UJamie, umlingisi oyinhloko uphonsa umfana, hhayi okokuqala, futhi uDylan, umlingiswa wesibili oyinhloko, naye, uphonsa intombi ngenxa yokusebenza kwakhe. Bobabili banquma ukuthi ubuhlobo obungathí sina abukho kubo. U-Dylan ufika eNew York ukuthola umsebenzi endlini enkulu yokushicilela, futhi esikhumulweni sezindiza uyazi uJamie, isikhulu salolu shicilelo lokushicilela, ubuhlobo buvela phakathi kwabo, futhi ukukhangwa kancane kancane kuvela. UJamie uyavuma ukulala nobulili ngaphandle kokuzibophezela, uDylan uyamsekela kulokhu.
- " Intsha / UbuNtu ". Ukukwazi ngokusebenzisa i-intanethi , egcwele amasayithi nezinhlelo zokusebenza zokukhetha umlingani - kwaba lula ukujwayele nokuziqhenya. Kulula kakhulu: ukuhlangana, ukulala ndawonye futhi ngaphandle kokuhlukaniswa, imizamo ehlukene ngendlela yokuthandana ayidingekile kulokhu. IGaby noMartin bahlangana nesicelo futhi banquma ukuchitha ubusuku ndawonye ngaphandle kokubala ukuqhubeka, kodwa kukhona okubanjene omunye komunye nomunye.
- " Ngaphezu kwezocansi / Azikho izikhonkwane ezihlanganisiwe ". U-Adam no-Emma bahlangana eminyakeni engu-15 eyedlule, kodwa ubuhlobo babo ngaleso sikhathi abukwenzeki. U-Adam uhamba ngezinyawo ukusuka kombhede owodwa waya kwesinye, futhi uma ukuthumela imiyalezo ngengozi ngesifiso sokuchitha isikhathi kuzo zonke izintombi zakhe uthumela umyalezo onjalo no-Emma. Bahlangana futhi badonsa ebuhlotsheni obungenasondo bobulili obusekelwe kuphela kumzimba wezemvelo. Abanamathengi futhi bakholelwa ukuthi badinga komunye nomunye ubulili kuphela. Ingabe kunjalo?