Ngaki, uma sibona umbhangqwana osemusha, sizibuza: "yini abafana ngayo?". Kungani bebonke? Umuntu omude, onesizotha kanye nentombazane enhle, engekho-isaziso, noma owesifazane omuhle, ohlotshisiwe kahle nomngane omncane, otholile. Kodwa, noma kunjalo, bebonke ndawonye iminyaka eminingi, baphile, umphefumulo nomphefumulo futhi bangaboni ukubukeka okuphazamisayo kwabadlula. Mayelana nobuhlobo obunjalo ungasho ukuthi "uthando lobubi," akabonanga amaphutha engxenye yesibili.
Uthando lubi - uzothanda futhi ...
Ukuzilolonga kuye kwafakazela ukuthi noma ubani angaba yinto ethandwayo, ngisho nembuzi ehlonishwayo esivela kumzekeliso owaziwayo. Ngokusho kwezibalo, imibhangqwana eminingi eshadile ihlukana ngemva kokuba omunye wabashade eqala ukuqonda ukuthi isigamu sakhe asiphelele kakhulu. Ihamba ngentshiseko yokuziqhenya nokuqeda konke, futhi nayo ingqondo yokugula kanye nabathandekayo bayaphenduka ebhokisini elimhlophe libe ngodada olubi. Qala ukucasula yonke imikhuba yakhe, izici zokubukeka nomlingiswa.
Ososayensi kwelinye lamanyuvesi eLondon babuza lo mbuzo: kungani izinyanga zokuqala (iminyaka) abathandi bathandana ngokungaboni futhi bengaboni ukushiyeka. Imiphumela yaphazamisa ngisho nabacwaningi ngokwabo. Kuvela ukuthi uthando oluqinile luphuphuthekisa abantu ngempela. Ubuchopho babo balahlekelwa ikhono lokuhlola ngokulinganayo iqiniso elizungezile. Ebuchosheni bomthandi kukhona izinguquko ezithile ezithinta izinhlelo ezibhekene nokuqonda ngokomzwelo kwezinto ezihlukahlukene. Kulesi simo, ububanzi bokuzwela kwezifunda zobuchopho obhekene nokuvuselela kunciphisa. Ngolimi olulula: indoda ethandwayo ibona yonke into emgodini wezibuko zama-rose, iphendula ngokomzwelo kuzo zonke izikhathi ezimnandi zokuphila kwayo futhi ayiqapheli ukungabi nalutho.
Uhlangothi olubi lwothando oluyimpumputhe noma kungani uthanda okubi?
Uthando luyimpumputhe. Uma uthanda ngempela, akunandaba ukuthi umuntu ubukeka kanjani, ukuthi uyaphila, lokho akwenzayo, ukuthi uyini umbono kwabanye. Okulandelayo kulo muntu uzizwa ujabule kakhulu emhlabeni. Ngakho kufanele kube, udinga ukuthanda umuntu ngokwakhe, hhayi ukubonakala kwakhe, isikhundla sakhe noma imali. Kodwa ...
Ngeshwa, kwenzeka ukuthi uthando oluyimpumputhe luphonsa owesifazane engxenyeni yezinkinga nezinhlekelele. Uthanda umuntu ongamthandi futhi amthobisa. Ukulungele ukukhuthazelela konke lokhu ngenxa yothando lwakhe. Owesifazane onjalo udinga usizo olungaphandle, ngoba yena ngokwakhe akakwazi ukubhekana nalo. Uma kungenjalo, kungase kube yisisulu sokuhlukunyezwa ngokomzimba noma kwengqondo.
Kwenzeka ukuthi ukuwa othandweni, intombazane ivala amehlo akhe ekuziphatheni okungalungile komlingani, kamuva ijwayele ukujwayela isimo sengqondo, futhi lapho kungekho mchamo ukukhuthazela - uhlala naye ngaphandle kokwesaba. Lokhu kuyindlela engalungile. Uma usuhlala isikhathi eside nomuntu onjalo, kuyoba nzima ngokwengeziwe ukuqeda.
Uthando - into embi kuphela kulabo abalahlekelwa ikhanda lakhe. Kunoma yisiphi isimo udinga ukugcina ukuzithiba nokuzethemba.
Ngakho-ke, thina, amantombazane, singayithandani naleyo mbuzi ngokwakhe?
Bheka nxazonke, mhlawumbe kukhona umuntu oseduze nawe ofanelwe ukunakwa, ngubani ozokuthanda, owazisa futhi owazisa. Thuthukisa, wazi ukuthi ufanelekile futhi ungavumeli noma ubani aphule impilo yakho. Uma ngabe umuzwa okhululekile usufihlile kakade, futhi awukwazi ukuhlola ngokwanele isimo, bese ulalela iseluleko somndeni wakho nabangani bakho. Ngokuvamile, livela ohlangothini owazi ukuthi yikuphi okukhethayo empeleni. Ngeke nje zisuse izibuko zakho ezibomvu kuwe, kodwa nazo zizokusiza ukuba uphume ekuthunjweni kothando olulimazayo.